Friday, February 24, 2012

My Beginning With Vitas - By Debi

When I first heard Vitas, I was going through a very bad time in my life, tears were an every day event for me.  I began to write my feelings down and so I will copy and paste those words here.
My daughter told me, "Mother you have to hear this guy sing", and so I did but what I was not expecting was for me to be so caught up and held captive. Since that day, I have done what I could to tell others of your extraordinary talent. My daughter says you give her goose-bumps, believe me this is not something she would so readily reveal.
I have only known of you for about 3 weeks and wish I could have known about you sooner.  I have days of sadness such as today.  I sat in my car and listened to your newest cd.  I closed my eyes and let my mind draw upon the healing sounds of your voice. It wasn't long before I realized that I had tears on my face caused by the emotions that you express so well.  I did not want to leave that moment and come back to earth
Sometimes it feels as if the day has been heavy and I feel burdened. I have a hard time clearing my head and remembering my blessings. The negative things surface and grab hold and hang on so tight.  I am able to drown out some of it by listening to Vitas.  Funny isn't it that we can find so much joy and peace from music?  His voice lifts me up and out of the muck that envelopes me sometimes. When I have to stop the music, I feel the weight of life and the darkness once again.  Tomorrow always brings the hope of peace and a day away from sadness.
My 11 year old daughter has become a fan.  Whenever I play him she asks what the song is called and what it is about and unfortunately I can't tell her what they are all about.  She and I watched Videos of him on YouTube and I could tell she is quite taken with him as I am.  She wanted to see pictures of him and she has her favorite songs.A couple of her favorites are "Mama" and "Shores of Russia".  I was able to explain the meaning behind  those well enough.My daughter and I are pretty close so she could empathize with Vitas losing his mother, and I knew she felt very touched by his loss.  She is such a blessing to me and I love her dearly as I do all my children.
I don't always take the time to write, but I listen to your music every chance I get.  I have given up on the idea of ever meeting you, but as long as I have my outlet for writing then I am ok.  I love your music as much now as I did right from the beginning. All those places that I go to when your music plays are the same welcoming places I go time and time again. A safe haven that my mind and thoughts can relax. I love you Vitas for what you make me feel when I listen to you and I love you for feelings that come alive while I listen to you sing.
I  haven't added anything new lately.   It is 3 days before your birthday and each day I check to see if the link to your birthday site is up yet.  It feels like things have somewhat fizzled out, I know that they haven't but it feels like it has.
I hope that your birthday went well and that you are getting the much needed rest,  enjoy life and be happy.
If I am not mistaken you are home getting a few days of much needed rest. I have all your cd's now that is available in the US and am building up my play lists on my computer so that I can put the cd's out in my car. 
I received "Smile", The single "Goodbye", "Songs of my Mother" DVD, and "Vitas at the Kremlin" DVD.  I love them all but I really favor "Songs of my Mother" DVD.  There were so many songs on there that I love and was able to watch Vitas perform them all on stage.

I won't be opening his single "Goodbye" but keep it safe.  I was told that it is rare, and so there is no way I want anything to  happen to it.

During the DVD of "Vitas at the Kremlin", I thought about how Vitas has changed over the years.  His voice and looks have become more refined.  His music was still wonderful when he was younger but there is a difference between what I witnessed on his Kremlin DVD and what I see in his music today.  I look forward to the future of the  music and voice that only Vitas possesses.

I pray that God will always keep him safe and happy.

My favorite still is "Songs of my Mother" DVD.
God bless you Vitas and those that help you in your everyday life.  Stay happy, stay sane, and keep smiling.
This has been a day of moods, I think I have run the gambit.  Then the evening came and I listened to Vitas and that always calms me and puts a smile on my face.  Then I heard from Diane with the news that Vitas is on tunes.  Wow, that is impressive.
I have had to transfer everything to a new computer.  I had a lot of things on the other one but started to have problems.
Anyway, I hadn't listened to Vitas for almost 24 hours, which if you have been around me you would know that  I don't go more than a couple of hours without listening to him since the first time.
When I heard him sing, it was wonderful and I felt renewed.
Vitas! Thank you for your wonderful talent that you so graciously share with us.
  I have been purchasing my music fromDeesvisions, but I know that GeminSun records and Russiandvds also sell authentic music for Vitas.
Diane, who operates Deesvisions has been so kind in replying to my emails and helping me out anyway she can. I want to publicly thank her.
Diane, who also runs the fansite for 
Vitasusahas emailed me a few times and been so kind as to answer any questions I have asked. She has been very patient with me and I thank her for that too.

I started to learn Russian so that I can better understand his music. I am actually enjoying it. I always thought Russian would be so much harder to learn but I am beginning to change my views on that. Even my son David, is helping me and he is speaking it also. It is such great fun.

Received in the mail the cd's I had ordered that have been done by Vitas.
1. Mama
2.Return home 1
3. Return home 2
4.A kiss as long as Eternity
5.The Philosophy of wonder
I was hoping that I could come on here and give my opinion of which cd was the best. As usual, I can't because they are all so good. I start to listen to one and think that it is my favorite until the next one comes on. I love his style and method of singing.He sings some songs that sound like Techno, I already like Techno so those songs were welcomed as well.I checked in the stores and Vitas is here in America!!!!, when I go shopping next week, I will be checking to see how well his music is selling. I am so excited to know that he is finally here and hoping to pave the way for his touring that I hope will bring him to my area.

Days ago I looked for inspiration to be creative. I thought of my children and life and how I wanted to portray each. I love working with 3D programs but unable to just sit down without any forethought does not motivate me much.
As I listened to your music, it created wonderful images in my mind and the motivation and almost a need to express myself, there were no tears or sadness today. I saw your videos of the pranks pulled on you. Humor is so important in life, my father was a wonderful man, his humor always seemed to keep us afloat of the storms that life brings. I miss him so much.
I await the US commercial that will be hitting us in 2 days. Vitas welcome to America, I think we are ready for you, I know I am.

Today I awoke to feel the world still a very heavy place. Sometimes I wonder why I stay when inside I feel dead. Today I listened to no music, another heartache I couldn't handle.
The wind howls outside like a trapped puppy, but for me it is a language I know. Sounds of the night are haunting but somehow comforts me like a lonely friend. I smiled and fought back the tears today even though they tried to escape my eyes.
So now I sit here so early in the morning and tell the things I cannot say. Who will hear and who will care?

You may never read this, you have so many fans all speaking of their undying love for you, and I am just one voice out of many.
Forgive me, if you do read this and you wonder what kind of crazy lady this is.
I forget that you may not speak English, but music transcends all language barriers and people come together in one heart. Sometimes it is music alone that speaks what our mouths cannot, so native tongues are not necessary always.
I have fretted and worried about the evils of the world and have at times watched my children fall, I cannot always catch them or fall for them. So much time I spend on wanting to keep them safe that I focus too much on the negative things. When I listen to your music, I am brought back to the realization that there is still beauty in this world as there is in your voice.
Although your voice and passion reach beyond the stars, your purity and grace keeps you grounded. With the beginning of each song I fall in love and at the close my heart breaks.
Someday when you are able to come toSeattleWashington, I will be there to hear you in person and take with me something priceless.
Vitas, the world is a better place for you being in it, and I know I am a better person for having the joy and pleasure of listening to you when life becomes more than I feel I can bear.
Your voice and music is haunting, wonderful, sensual, hypnotic, consuming. I have never heard anything like it.

Vitas! You don't have to learn to speak English, your accent and language is wonderful and I am quite smitten with the whole package.
So this was the beginning of my love affair with Vitas, the man with the diamond voice.

By Debi

Friday, February 17, 2012

Vitas: My Savior

It was December 19th, 2011 and I was doing my usual Youtube video watching and I was on a comedian show then on the side it said, "Man and his Crazy Voice". I clicked on it and it was a bald guy singing an opera song. I didn't like the song at first but a couple more tries of listening to it and I could not stop listening to it. That was my first Vitas song: Opera 2. I then saw that almost all of his songs were on the side. So I listened to them and I could not stop listening to him. I had to have listened to Opera 2 about 50 times, over and over. I then went on Facebook and posted my first status about him. I wrote, "I found this amazing singer. His name is Vitas." Then I posted the link to Opera 2. While I was on Facebook, I then searched up Vitas and sure enough there was his official page. I liked it and went on photos and I could not believe how GORGEOUS he was! I fell in love with his voice. It was Christmas break and I felt so lucky that I found him and/or he found me! I then went on his videos and listened to certain ones that I liked a lot. I told my mom about him and she didn't like his music but I ignored that because I LOVED him! For Christmas I had gotten and Itunes card and searched up Vitas on Itunes and there he was. They had one album. I bought Dedication, Nessun Dorma, La Donna E Mobile, and Opera 2. I still have yet to buy more but I don't have any money on my Itunes account :( . By the end of 2 weeks I probably had listened to Vitas 200 times. I could not get enough of his music and his voice! January 2012: I had officially talked to friends about Vitas at school. I could not stop about talking to him. But the ignorance of their denial made me mad and somewhat sad at what they said. Some of my friends said that he sounded like a girl and that he was annoying and how could anybody like him? But I ignored their ignorance and I continued to like Vitas. No matter what anyone said no one would take Vitas away from me. Not even my friends. That's what I liked about Vitas. He was versatile, unique, and he was PERFECT! I got my best friend to listen to his music and she liked him but she isn't such a lover like me. I had friends come over in February on the 5th and I said here is Vitas. They laughed and guess what I did? I kicked them out of my house! I know, I know it sounds mean but I had to do what was meant. They haven't talked to me since which proves that weren't good enough friends to get over it. Later in this month I started having requests from fellow Vitas lovers. I accepted the requests and I said, "Hi. :))." They replied saying Hi, do you love Vitas? I responded yes. They responded and we talked. We said where we were from and how old we were. They were surprised my age. Almost everyone I talked to said, "WOW!". Here's the thing...I'm...14. Surprised?! Well after everyone I was surprised I told them about my dream.. My dream to go to a Vitas concert and have him choose me to go on stage and sing with him.. That was my huge dream. My other dream was to get every CD Vitas had. Earlier in February, I had met a Russian teenager off Youtube named Alexei and he and I got in touch via Facebook and talked for hours. He told me about a Russian website called and I went on it and made an account. Back to my Vfriends. I now have 39 Vfriends and counting. I have talked to almost every single one of them and they're sooooo nice. My Vfriends are probably the nicest group of people I have ever met. I now call them my Vfamily. They're just like family. They support me and just all have the same passion for Vitas' music like I do.
Vitas' Songs: My first two songs were Opera 2 and Love Me. Vitas' song Blessed Guru was my third. I liked that song because he was my "Blessed Guru". I then listened to MAMA, dedicated to his mom. When I learned what the lyrics were I cried. His mom was such a brave soul and she was amazing. She nurtured an amazing son and he shall never forget his amazing mom and all she did for him. I have watched all of his videos and liked all of them. His songs are SO powerful and meaningful that once I turn his music on I'm in a state of Nirvana and I cannot escape it. His music is so enticing and is sung to perfection. My heart still melts everytime he sings MAMA. That's how powerful his music is and my heart is always skipping 1000 beats because of his music. Bird of Happiness and One,Two,Three and 2 of my favorite dancing songs. They're so catchy and fun to sing and dance to! I can actually sing and dance, I'm in show choir and choir at school and they're such fun songs to practice singing to! His songs always make my day. 4 songs that I absolutely LOVE: Lucia Di Lammermoor, A Kiss as Long as Eternity, The Star, and Crane's Crying. All amazing songs and all sung to perfection. I have practiced and practiced singing Lucia Di Lammermoor and Crane's Crying because of the long and glorious notes. I can now finally hold them without losing breath. I have mastered singing Shores of Russia, I can now sing every lyric! That makes me proud. I now love sparkles because of Vitas. I have grown to a whole new level of living. I appreciate everything and I'm always in a state of Nirvana, even in bad situations. Vitas brings me hope and inspiration. I strive everyday to do my best at everything and accept what I'm not good at. He makes me smile every time I hear his uplifting music. He brings me peace and love. I LOVE VITAS! That's why Vitas is my Savior.
-Madi Corl <3 Vitas Lover

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

By Rudy-USA

I first heard Vitas by total accident in the middle of 2008. I looked up "Opera" on YouTube and "Opera 2" showed
up. I thought the guy was cute and I liked the style of the song. But then a minute or so into it he wailed out this
beautiful voice and I was in awe. I looked up every Vitas song imaginable and showed my husband. He too, is
fascinated. I was going through a really hard time then, and contemplated suicide a few times. I never had anything
I could turn to that I knew would snap me out of that. I remember one night sitting on my bathroom floor curled up
in a ball wondering which medication I could take that would kill me faster. At the time I always had Vitas playing
from my TV from his DVDs or from the computer, just playing in the background. I was literally pounding and
beating myself up, hitting my legs and scratching my arms. So unhappy with myself, and just a lost soul.
I had sleeping medications laid out in front of me. The bottle contained about 17 pills which I thought about taking. I
do believe in Angels. I always had. And at that moment, I heard Vitas singing. For some reason seemed like the
volume might have been louder. Because I don't remember hearing the other songs this clearly. I suddenly felt this
release. The pain I was feeling lifted from me as I listened to this song I never heard from him. So sitting on my
bathroom floor minutes away from either taking the bottle of pills or just going to a loony bin, I raised my head up to
listen to this upbeat song. I realized when I was listening that it was a live concert because i heard people
screaming for him. And he would remove the microphone from his voice when he sang and it was beautiful. I was
intrigued! I got up and went to the computer where I had been playing random playlists of Vitas. Ironically the
songs title? "Smile"....Ulybnis. It was from his 2003 concert. the words to his song was what I needed to hear:
Smile! If the rain outside the window won't stop...
Smile! If you failed to do something...
Smile! If happiness hid behind the clouds...
Smile! Even if your soul got slightly scratched...
Smile! And you'll see how everything changes...
Smile! The rain will stop and the ground will dress up in snow...
Smile! And your sorrow will pass by...
Smile! And then your soul will begin to live...
Vitas in fact saved me that night. Whether it was from doing something completely stupid, or just having that black
cloud of depression.
I use Vitas "songbird from the gods" "Angel without wing" "Tibetan Plateau" "kiss as long as eternity" "The sea is
my home"..etc any of his beautiful slower songs when getting a massage or accupuncture and so on. Usually those
places play nice calming music, and are more than happy to play music of your choice at time of visit. Happy to say
I turned on my accupuncturist who now plays Vitas for her clients as well. :)
It's amazing the places Vitas takes you. The way his music makes you feel. No singer has ever made me get
goosebumps every time I hear his songs. EVERY time. And the thought of seeing him in concert brings me to
tears. It would be a dream. I love Vitas SO much that I don't see him as one of us. I see him as a true Angel. For so
many reasons. His voice, his energy, his amazingly beautiful face. The way he can save lives, as im sure I am not
the only ones he's saved.
I was able to pick up the pieces of my life and understand my issues. And fast forward to now I couldn't be happier
with where I am. I have not felt the way I did that night....since the night I DID feel that way. My depression is gone,
no anxietys, no anything. Just happiness. My husband and I worked things out. All that repairing to my life and
relationship, there was one person who was there and it sure as hell was Vitas.
My husband and I got matching Vitas tattoos on our wrists. We wanted to show our dedication, our admiration, and
our love for this one person that lives on the other side of the world that we have never even seen in person. To
me thats freaking amazing the power he has. Like that of a God.
I love listening to Vitas anywhere, anytime. Constantly telling people about him. His music takes you away to a
place nobody has probably ever been. Heaven flows out of his mouth when he sings. That's the best way i can
personally describe it.
If your just as committed to his music, just as inspired, just as magically moved, and just as in love with Vitas as I
am...then you can understand what I mean when I say to you that Vitas is the most unique, talented, beautiful,
"other-worldly" person on this earth!
I thank him from the bottom of my heart for being there for me and others with his music. I wonder how anybody
could be happy without his music. When I feel like I need to escape the pressures and suffering of this world, I get
lost in Vitas. And i go on this musical journey that carries me to the heavens.

By Tatianna Raquel

My name is Tatianna Raquel. I'm from Brazil. On August 2008 I discovered Vitas music when I watched Vitas singing "The Bird of Happiness" on You Tube, and from 2008 on foward I became Vitas' fan when I entered the Vitas' Official site. Since then I began downloading songs and vids and sharing pics - everything from Vitas' - and I have acquired the Vitas' 40-minute-digital download "Light of a New Day" for my relaxation, wellness ant antistress. I even began learning Russian because of him! In 2010 I got from his site 3 DVDs and a CD "Say You Love" (it's amazing!) and I began listening to Vitas' non-album-songs (most of them digital downloads - Mp3 formats). The newer it's posted on his official site, the more I download 'em to my enjoyment. Vitas music keeps saving my life (as I'm safe by Vitas music)! Now I'm Vitas' Brazilian fan, I have many Vitas' CDs, DVDs, digital music downloads and pics and I can hardly wait to see Vitas perform in Brazil (because I love Vitas and I always will)!
Vitas music keeps touching my life and it will do it with mine!
Many greetings from Brazil!
With all my best,
Tatianna Raquel

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Vitas Found Me!

It was a difficult night, December 16, 2011. My Pastors wife had just passed away. She was also my mother's aunt and it was very unexpected. Everthing was making sense and at the same time it wasnt. I couldnt sleep as always, the feeling of coming home to only my bed never appealed to me much. I went online, like im accustomed to. Youtube is one of the sites I always check. Along with Facebook and Twitter. I remember someone posted a video on Facebook, of which the contents I cannot remember, for what I was about to find moments later would be what I have been waiting for all my life.
The video led me to Youtube and it was funny, of what I could remember. I think it had something to do with a funny singer from one of those talent shows. on the suggested videos I noticed one titled, "The Man With His Crazy Voice". It appealed to me for some reason. I clicked on it, not knowing that that one click would change my life forever!
The music was... Joyfull. I enjoyed violins, even orchestra for that matter. Then what I would describe as "the most peaceful voice I have ever heard in my life", begins to sing in a language I recognized. Russian, it was one I was familiar with since It was one I had chosen to learn. Although hard teaching yourself, haha.
As soon as those high notes came out... I was in shock! I could not believe it. What was that? I thought to myself. Woah!!! I had never heard anyone, much less a man make such a beautiful sound like that before. I had to keep listening. And again with the high notes... By this time I was so surprised tears were coming down my face. Most great singers give me chills down my spine... But no, this new (to me) singer had brought only Tears of... I dont know how to describe it. He was Perfect, he was Vitas!
I had discovered Vitas, or rather, Vitas had found me! After coming out of the shock I was in, I knew my life was about to take a huge turn. I had to know who this amazing singer was. I watched more videos on Youtube of him and I came to one of Vitas singing "Besame Mucho". Woah!!! I said again, he sings in Spanish? Amazing, my first Language. I knew from that moment Vitas was going to be a great part of my everyday life.
My past consisted of pretty sad moments. Ive been through a lot. But God was very Merciful of me. Thanks to Him I am sane and whole, not to mention alive. But that didnt mean I didnt suffer from depression on my lonely hours of the night. My past was too harsh on me to ever forget. The lying and abuse always came back to mind. Forgiving is one thing but forgetting is a whole other thing. I am a pretty shy and closed person, for that same reason. Only certain things made me happy. And Vitas was about to become one of them.
The next song I heard was one that I cant spend the day without hearing more than once. "Ulibnis" Smile. I could just picture him recording this with a huge smile on his face. Oh, how it makes me smile so much. In fact listening to Vitas has made me smile more then I have in my entire life. I cant stop. His music and his voice always positive expressions make me happy.
I have done what I can to obtain most of his music, it has become part of my life. I go through my day with Vitas singing, as if he was the soundtrack to my life.
Someone told me that Vitas comes to you at the time when you need him most. I agree... I dont know how but its true. I have heard many people have been healed with his voice. I can say he healed me from extreme sadness. I am now more happier and confident.
I am a big Music fan, and I enjoy singing as well. Although I get very judgemental while singing or listening to someone sing. But that didnt happen with Vitas. He was Perfect, I couldn't find anything wrong with his voice, or his performace. he hit every note exactly the way it should be. He is musically intellegent and has an extraordinary talent!
Listening to the song "Dedication" brought me to tears. Not because of the lyrics, for there are none, or the music, for its mainly Piano and drums. But the Melody of his Voice. Vitas sings this song with so much passion and as the title states, dedication. On the high notes you can feel the Pain! It has become my favorite song, for the emotions produced by this song are endless to me. I believe there is no greater instrument then the Human Voice.
Now, how can you not believe in God, when he gives certain people such great talent. I dont think Vitas was touched by an angel, I believe he was touched by God and sent to help those of us in need. Vitas is a gift to the world. Vitas is Our Voice! Thank you God! Thank You Vitas!

Sunday, January 8, 2012

My trail to Vitas

I found this Music Therapy blog a week or two ago. As per usual with me, I had a hard time trying to post to it. You see, I laughingly call myself "Tech-lexic" meaning: anything having to do with technology just escapes me. My cell phone for example, is way more phone than I need or require, but it's pretty, and it looks kind of flashy, so I bought it! I can't however do anything more with it, than call, text, or take an occasional picture... but I digress.
As I said, I had found the music therapy page earlier, and had made several attempts to post to it. So, understand that I had written my story several times. However, because of the tech-lexia I failed to save any of the previous attempts. Now, after reading more of the stories, I realized that I wasn't even breaking the surface of what Vitas really meant to me, or why I had needed his healing voice in my life. So, here goes, trying again to write my story of "My Trail to Vitas."
I don't want to go into minute detail of my childhood and early life, I figure we all escaped our dysfunctional families, broken hearts, scrapes with sexual molestation, low self esteem etc... ad nauseum. Not to belittle anyone else, I just don't want to itemize my deductions this close to tax time! Suffice it to say, that due to poor health, I spent most of my time in bed, my only entertainment being books, TV, the internet, and my puppy dog Baby. (Such a love!) Would you believe that with such a life, I found myself very depressed?
Concentrating this part of the story on my internet surfing, I spent loads of time on YouTube. I spent many hours of the day there, looking up laughing babies, cute pets, and yes, I'll admit to seeking out some of the gory pictures too like that man with the warts all over his body... Yikes! But it was the music where I spent most of my time. I'd listen to one song, and look to the side bar and click on the next one that took my fancy. I kept seeing what I thought was a stupid post saying "The Man with the Crazy Voice". I kept avoiding that one for months, just because the title annoyed me! Well, one night, I remember it well, it was in May of 2006, I finally got over my aversion to that "crazy voice", and clicked it. It took me to Vitas, singing Opera 2; the video where he is on stage with the hooded musicians, and the fans in the grandstand behind him moaning and waving their arms. I listened, I watched, I got hooked! One song, one listen. He mesmerized me. So young, yet he seemed to have such command of the stage, and of course I loved his cheeky expressions for the camera!
It took me a while of surfing to realize that this was one of Vitas' first songs, that he had been around for several years before I found him. That he had literally thousands of videos on Youtube, and maybe hundreds of songs out there to listen to. From that night on, my YouTubing was concentrated on Vitas. I learned my way around the internet to more sites, and all the info I could gobble up about him. As time went on, more and more people posted English translations for his songs. Then, not just the sound of his voice filled me, but also the beauty of his words settled in my soul..
Almost immediately, I started feeling more at peace with myself, and my health. More accepting of things that I had no control over, and happiness started creeping back into my life. I started sharing his music with my kids and grand kids. They put up with my fascination, and even had a few of their own favorite songs. If ever I was away from my computer, Vitas songs played in my head all day, and kept me in a good place. Over time, I found my way to FaceBook, and all the lovely Vitas fans around the world whom I now count as friends. I'm not so alone in my room anymore.
Fast forward to August of 2010, when the announcement came out on Vitas' web page that a USA/Canada tour was planned for December and January 2010/11! OMG! Right? I was ecstatic, as I'm sure all of you were as well! I literally jumped out of bed and ran around the house shouting it to anyone who could hear that "Vitas is coming to the states!" Woo Hoo!! And this is where my story gets good! I decided right then and there, that if I was going to get the chance to see Vitas, and he see me... I was going to do something about my health and body. I got serious about my eating habits, and quit drinking soda pop completely. I was given a treadmill, and I put on a Vitas playlist, and walked/sang myself to a 75 pound weight loss, and the best health I had been in for nearly 20 years! I was inspired. I kept my eyes on the prize, and Vitas was that prize for me.
Through meeting so many other Vitas fans out there, an offer came to me to be onstage with Vitas at his Los Angeles venue, as one of his "Birdies". Did I want to do it I was asked? Heck YEAH I typed! So yes, lucky-lucky me, I got to sing and dance with Vitas to Bird of Happiness. The entire 4 plus minutes of being on stage with him is a cherished memory! The night was surreal, and I did my best to just keep myself in the moment. I actually got to meet Vitas! Sometimes it is still hard to believe.
After the concert we were all invited back stage to meet and greet him, where he kindly signed autographs for everyone that wanted one. He was so genuinely happy to see all of us, and he is really just a sweet, wonderful man in person. He had to be tired! He had 7 concerts to perform from one coast to another from the USA to Canada, yet he sat after that concert and signed until the last fan got her autograph. By the time I was done, I had gotten 3 kisses and 2 hugs, 2 autographs on paper and one... wait for it... one autograph on my arm, next to my ~V~ tattoo. Yes, in anticipation of his coming to America, I had his logo tattooed on my left arm. So, while I was backstage with him, he signed his name right above his logo, in purple. When I got home, I had his signature tattooed permanently on my arm. I couldn't wash that arm for 3 days until I got to my tattoo artist... Not that I wanted to wash the arms or hands or cheeks that touched him anyway! :-) Whenever I look at my tattoo, it brings me right back to that stage, that night, and all that happiness I felt at being near Vitas. This tattoo is the only one I have, and the only one I will EVER have. I feel to get another tattoo would lessen how I feel about Vitas, and there is nothing that will cause that! Yes, I am the true meaning of the word FANatic! You can see a little pic of my tattoo in my profile pic on the blog! :-)
What is it about Vitas that touches us so? I can never explain it. Is it the sound, the range, the timbre of his voice? Is it his poetry? His physical beauty? His passion, honesty, generosity? I think it is all of the above, and more. I am forever grateful that I clicked on his crazy voice. Through Vitas, I have lost the loneliness and depression that were my only friends. Through Vitas I have found many new and wonderful friends around the world who maybe are just a little bit FANatic like me! Through Vitas I got to throw away all my fat clothes! Thank you Vitas for all you have done for me and for so many around the world!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

How Vitas help me come back to life

I discovered Vitas in 2006. It was near the second anniversary of my son's death. I lost my son to suicide when he was 29 years old. He was despondent over health issues, loss of a job, and a broken heart. Too much came down on him at once for his tender heart to withstand. It is the most horrible thing for a parent to lose a child for any reason...but suicide, it is indescribable torment. A parent feels they should be able to protect their child. So with the loss is not only grief, but guilt, regret, and endless "what if" scenarios that replay over and over.
My husband and I went to grief counseling, and we learned that our son's suicide was like many - he hid his deep pain from those closest to him, putting on a brave front, not wanting to hurt the ones he loved. And they do not realize that their method of escape is what will hurt the ones left behind the most. They think they are relieving them of burden. Intellectually, I get this. And I know that probably nothing I could have done would probably have changed the outcome. But emotionally, I could not let go of the grief and pain. I went through the motions of life, but my heart was dark and sad, and I cried alone at night when no one could hear or see me. All joy was gone, and I was not able to enjoy my other children as I should have. They reminded me of the missing one...

Then I found Vitas. I was just about ready to go to bed, and there he was on the front page of Yahoo as I went to shut my PC down...Opera 2. For some reason I watched, and like many people was amazed. I showed the video to my youngest son, who loved him. He sent me on a hunt for more of his music. I did not know it at the time, but this was the beginning of my road to healing.

While Opera 2 was impressive, it was Vitas' ballads - the songs about his mom, and the songs filled with so much emotion that got to me and helped me heal. I cannot explain exactly how the music helped me. But I saw the deep love for his mom, and the grief and longing in one song...then the next he is smiling and singing "Bird of Happiness" or "The Kings Can do Everything." I connected deeply with his grief, and at the same time admired how he could go on and smile and be happy while still missing her and loving her. This was a great lesson for me. It helped me see that I could/should also be taking joy in life and in my other children, and not let this grief consume me forever.

I cannot say I thought it out exactly that way at the time. Most of this is what I think after reflection about how and why listening to Vitas helped me. At the time, it just felt like magic. I could cry with him, smile with him, and when I was listening, I felt GOOD. His music made me smile, sing, dance.

So I kept listening, and the more I listened the more devoted to Vitas I became. And here I am almost 6 years later, still listening and loving his voice and everything he does. Of course I will always miss and grieve for my son, but discovering Vitas was the turning point of moving on with life and not letting the grief consume me. I did some research on music therapy since this happened, and I found that there is a scientific basis for how music heals. Whatever the qualities in music that makes this happen, Vitas must have them in abundance. His voice is more than amazing. Maybe it is a little bit magic...